emancipated dissonance from the desk of renee ann

emancipated dissonance

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

she says it better:

when a note is long
as the cellist draws her bow
and warms the pitch with her left hand
loving the string with her fingertip
there is time to let the sound fill
and rise—fill the well of you
time to notice the longing
for a note that may follow
time to anticipate—time
to know the tingling in your limbs
for thoughts of music
yet to come

I wrote a poem about patience. Then I watched the evening breeze breathe in my curtains, and I wondered how something so gentle and sweet to the skin can be so cruel--to bring, in silent softness, the end of a day I want to keep, if only a few hours more.

Grasping wildly for the future before me and for my vanished past, it's a wonder I'm not torn apart.

thanks for being who you are, my abigail. i love you more than i can say. and i will pray some patience your direction.

posted by renee 5:26 PM

Monday, August 25, 2008

sometimes it takes all i have to fight off the disease of comfort.

posted by renee 11:52 AM

Thursday, August 14, 2008

"Things were better back when they were worse."

This is a video from an old TED conference about why we're all so unhappy.... we have too many choices, it turns out. Every time you pick something over all the other options, you are all too aware of the good qualities of all the things you're giving up. You also have really high expectations because of the seemingly limitless options available to you. The perfect thing is surely out there somewhere, all you have to do is find it - which means that every time you're unhappy with the results, you've got no one to blame but yourself.

All I know is buying shampoo is a very stressful experience these days, and I generally should not be allowed to go to the grocery store without a helper. It's worth watching the whole thing if you've got time.

... and sorry about the weird echo image - i am not geeky enough to figure out why it's doing that...

posted by renee 5:01 PM

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

tie the ends of the spectrum up in a pretty knot
where hate is love and knowing is an empty thought

i'm not afraid of the fearsome depths
but cower to your shining faces
i shall not run when you unleash threats
but lift me high and i'll leave no trace

you betray yourself with humility
you redeem yourself with pride
on mountain tops in the open air it's hard to breathe
it's hardest to see with open eyes
and i'm blind

the door is wide to let in joy
but cannot make it stay
by your search for truth you will be destroyed
and everything's still gray
in my mind


i need: a year. with people around me that i trust. to start from scratch. grow new roots in determined discipline. fast and pray. and i need a piano there and a way to record it. and i need to do it soon.

posted by renee 5:53 PM

Tuesday, August 12, 2008


problem: something is wrong.
solution: make a power point.

posted by renee 3:47 PM

Monday, August 11, 2008

a long time ago, someone wrote me this:

Once we get to the root of your ideology based on your religious beliefs and conditioning, we can dig deeper and find that it all is a deception designed to control your mind, body, and soul.

and yesterday, my bandmate told me that aliens talk to him and are watching us and waiting to just see what we will do and are often weighing the possibility of going ahead and blowing us all up rather than just waiting for us to do it ourselves. the solution is not to get a 9-to-5 but to expect something more than material security.

also, music is risky, risky business.

thanks to everyone who made it out for my infinity birthday. i felt loved.

posted by renee 11:41 AM

Thursday, August 07, 2008

posted by renee 6:33 PM

Monday, August 04, 2008

on why camping in canada is better than real life

days of sleeping on the ground
rain pounding
on my fabric ceiling
the clearing of clouds
thousands of thousands of pinpricks in
the fabric ceiling of the earth

back where we seem to rule it
drops roll off shingles
my bed is falsely soft
an absurd luxury
faces again get scrubbed and painted
and the face of the sky is blank and empty

posted by renee 9:10 AM


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my band(mates)
thomas built the wall
casey on the drums

other friends
joa jean
nate t
nate b
the MAN i hate
my ex-neighbor

some i wish were my friends

music i listen to
band of horses
zoe keating
rilo kiley
(jenny lewis)
mr 1986
regina spektor
iron & wine
the new pornographers
radio on
the combo
emiliana torrini
sigur ros
nickel creek
trampled by turtles
the hold steady
the decemberists
del the funky homosapien
death cab
tv on the radio

the guys that review it
jason (in a kilt)
peter c

and the places to hear it
the fine line
varsity theater
the 400 bar
first avenue

found magazine
my pottery teacher
my favorite designer
aesthetic apparatus
the friendly stegosaurus

railroad illusions
we'll go sit on a coal car
bask in the soft light
and dream of a someday
simpler than this one

take a walk with me tonight, my dear
away from complications
away from fluorescent lights

we'll go lay on a rooftop
breathe in the sweet smoke
and talk of a place that’s
so far from this one

take a walk with me tonight, my dear
away from complications
away from conditioned air

we'll get lost under covers
smile at our trite words
and fall for a vision
so far from the truth

take a walk with me tonight, my dear
away from complications
away from the flightless facts

LEMUR is the answer!!