emancipated dissonance from the desk of renee ann

emancipated dissonance

Friday, May 27, 2005


my panera coworkers are explaining that now i'm a "real person" so i won't be working there anymore. ha ha ha. and this morning i made a big breakfast for a bunch of nice people. and last night i helped make a big dinner for a bunch more nice people and said goodbye to vorn, who is getting married. that is exciting, too, but i'd rather have a job than a husband at the moment, thank you :-)


plus, it's a relief that now i don't have to burn metro council down. that would have been a bummer and then i probably would have gotten in trouble for it.

posted by renee 5:12 PM

Sunday, May 22, 2005

so on friday i went to the zoo with a good friend. we laughed at the wobbly baby monkeys and the barking prarie dogs. then, i got my surprise graduation present: a 45 minute massage de chanda. mmmm. then, after a nice dinner out, the second surprise: a graduation party! and i danced with my friends until 3 in the morning. people are so so nice to me. thanks boys and maria :-) you make me smile.

high fever today.
job interview tomorrow.

posted by renee 8:40 PM

Sunday, May 15, 2005

so someone who got kicked out of nye's on thursday got mad, went home, came back with a gun and shot the bouncer while i was obliviously chatting across the street at the times. for some reason that doesn't really feel like anything to me. it probably should.
then, last night, i went to a $25 faint/bright eyes show.
i decided that i only want to be friends with people who like watching the faint.
it was indeed a dance par-tay.
and a revisitation of the strange thoughts on celebrity that happen when i realize people think conor has that untouchable famous i-was-born-cool-enough-to-have-a-ten-person-band-backing-me-up thing when he's really just a dude. a pretty small dude, even.
but i secretly wish that i was gretta cohn. now there's a rock star.

and now maria's moving home.
boo hoo
boo hoo

coherent, interesting thoughts flash into my brain and disappear just as quickly. i feel like writing a song, but that it could only possibly come out of me if i were in a big empty auditorium in the dark.

people want so much to like each other and want so much to care about each other that sometimes it doesn't work because they want it too badly.

matt simmons says things sometimes that haunt me. "do you think life is hard or easy?" he asks. and i answer at once with confidence. and then i wonder. and wonder some more. and eventually all i know is that the answer to that question is very very important and i'm not at all sure i know what it is.

posted by renee 12:26 AM

Thursday, May 12, 2005

out of the gun
a hundred thousand miles an hour
through skin
through muscle and fat
through bone
through organs
through more bone, muscle, fat and skin
a hundred thousand miles an hour
out of his body



seven times, in total

dead bouncer

a block away: salsa dancing


caution tape
police cars
no suspect yet
out the window

a mile from home

seven times? wild.

posted by renee 11:43 PM

Friday, May 06, 2005


posted by renee 8:46 PM

Thursday, May 05, 2005

so i showed up to my health and illness class this morning completely unprepared to take the last test of my entire undergraduate career. and i'm talking to the girls behind me about how good we've all gotten at faking that we know what we're talking about on soc tests and how much we don't care anymore. and then karen comes in and says that because we've been such a good class and have contributed so well to discussions and already taken three (well... two and a half, really) tests and done all these discussion questions (which i didn't really do many of) that she's not going to make us take this test if we're happy with our current grades.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

i keep bursting into laughter uncontrollably. i could not possibly have asked for a better last two weeks of school.

so i went downtown and bought myself two shirts and a bouquet of daisies at the farmers market and now i'm going to listen to ani difranco.

posted by renee 1:42 PM

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

a group of forward thinking university students, mothers and non-mothers, women and men, discuss their reaction to the new trend to check fetuses for genetic diseases and mutations. many times, tests are available before 20 weeks so that the mother can terminate the pregnancy if she doesn't want a child with cystic fibrosis or down's syndrome. with passion in their voices they rant about the unfairness of someone determining if someone else counts as human depending on whether or not they have a disability. they are convinced. they will not budge from their anger against eugenic abortion.

and i sit back and shake my head and think about all the fetuses, perfectly healthy and otherwise, that are not considered human enough to live just because someone doesn't want them.

posted by renee 5:10 PM

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

i think i might want to get my master's in urban planning, either from nyu or usc. but for now i'm sticking around the cities and my beautiful fat grey cat.

mmm... buttery crackers...

oh, and also i just figured out today that i don't have to get B+'s in both of my electives to graduate summa cum laude (my thesis passed! yay!). no, i actually have to get C+'s.....

ha ha ha ha ha ha

if i had a livejournal and had to put one of those bouncing icons with the word for a feeling next to it, i would choose a smiling one and the word "triumphant."

posted by renee 10:45 AM


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my band(mates)
thomas built the wall
casey on the drums

other friends
joa jean
nate t
nate b
the MAN i hate
my ex-neighbor

some i wish were my friends

music i listen to
band of horses
zoe keating
rilo kiley
(jenny lewis)
mr 1986
regina spektor
iron & wine
the new pornographers
radio on
the combo
emiliana torrini
sigur ros
nickel creek
trampled by turtles
the hold steady
the decemberists
del the funky homosapien
death cab
tv on the radio

the guys that review it
jason (in a kilt)
peter c

and the places to hear it
the fine line
varsity theater
the 400 bar
first avenue

found magazine
my pottery teacher
my favorite designer
aesthetic apparatus
the friendly stegosaurus

railroad illusions
we'll go sit on a coal car
bask in the soft light
and dream of a someday
simpler than this one

take a walk with me tonight, my dear
away from complications
away from fluorescent lights

we'll go lay on a rooftop
breathe in the sweet smoke
and talk of a place that’s
so far from this one

take a walk with me tonight, my dear
away from complications
away from conditioned air

we'll get lost under covers
smile at our trite words
and fall for a vision
so far from the truth

take a walk with me tonight, my dear
away from complications
away from the flightless facts

LEMUR is the answer!!